yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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