Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize
