Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
porn star boner night. come get it.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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