You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
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