i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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