For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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