I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize