His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
