PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Don't make out with my wife yet
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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