But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
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