if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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