with your own penis?
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
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