Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Randomize
