Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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