this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
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