So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Be still, my beating vagina.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
