wanna go halves on a baby?
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize