that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
