wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Randomize
