he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
