my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
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