OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize