Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
