Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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