one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
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