I got chris browned last night
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
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