Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
We need to rekindle our bromance
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
Randomize
