so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize