I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize
