whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Randomize
