i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
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