i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I need a beard to bite.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
