garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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