I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
