I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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