Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
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