Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Randomize
