I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
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