You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
