So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
