i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
