Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Randomize
