Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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