whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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