I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
thus making me awesome and them whores
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
