oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Randomize