what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Randomize
