maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
third nipple confirmed
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
I'm sobbing to NWA
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
