Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
