Whod you bang
I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime