I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
These 19 People Are Into The Grossest Sex Fetishes
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
People Weigh In On Whether It’s Okay to Bang Your Roommate
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
No idea. I blame fireball.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.