I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I am full of burrito and curiosity
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
25 Of The Most Common Life Mistakes Young People Make
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
25 People Confess What They Really Think When They See An Obese Person
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?