White coat. Heels.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
