Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Randomize