this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Randomize
