their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Randomize
